1. Recommending FIVE things readers need to know every morning is REALLY annoying.
2. The number FIVE is NEITHER significant NOR helpful.
3. ONE really important thing readers need to know is more welcome than an additional two, three or four things readers DON'T.
4. SIX OR MORE important things beat five important or unimportant ones EVERY TIME.
5. ONE important thing readers need to know is probably NEVER GOING TO APPEAR in a last-minute, cobbled-together column recommending FIVE things readers DO.
5. IGNORANCE IS BLISS. It is perfectly possible to lead a happy and effective life without knowing any of the FIVE things readers supposedly NEED TO KNOW.
6. ABSENCE makes the heart grow FONDER.