Those attending the hustings on 23 March may be forgiven for thinking there was something wrong with the church's central heating. However, the strange noises at the back of the sanctuary in fact emanated from 'Jaundiced of Claremont' – Spurtle's splenetic and impartial correspondent – who was alternately chewing his knuckles and banging his head off the wall.
Here are his impressions of the 8 candidates for the Edinburgh Northern and Leith constituency on their first question-and-answer session of the election season. All opinions are those of 'Jaundiced of Claremont' and are neither endorsed nor refuted by the Spurtle. [Photos by Purple Kite Productions.]
For a complete (and very long) list of candidates in Edinburgh Northern and Leith, Edinburgh Central, and the Lothians, see Breaking news, 30.3.11.
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[img_assist|nid=1641|title=|desc=|link=node|align=right|width=200|height=200]Willie Black (Solidarity): Besides omnipresent conspiracy of the Rich against the Poor, the main elephant in the room was the repeated reference to an elephant in the room rather than detailed policy.
Best moment: Crowd clapped his wake up/take to the streets in defence of the NHS; laughed at his ‘socialist’ aspiration for everyone to win prizes, not just his daughter.
Worst moment: Saccharine anecdote about deprived child and a tree.
Effectiveness on the night: 6/10
[img_assist|nid=1643|title=|desc=|link=node|align=right|width=200|height=200]Maggie Chapman (Scottish Green): Alert, informed, competent, and prepared to display more emotional oomph than some other candidates.
Best moment: Call to preserve the NHS but reduce its wastefulness; or popular demand for hotel bed tax; or commonsensical defence of party political system.
Worst moment: Rambling digression on narrowing pay gaps between richest and poorest City of Edinburgh Council officials during question on Arts funding.
Effectiveness on the night: 8/10
[img_assist|nid=1644|title=|desc=|link=node|align=right|width=200|height=200]Malcolm Chisholm (Labour): Sometimes seems to inhabit his own religious steeple, but this evening mostly down to earth, widely informed, focused.
Best moment: Strong on all areas; audience liked his willingness to intervene over Inverleith, and desire to forge free-thinking, non-tribal political culture at Holyrood.
Worst moment: Occasionally sat like a marionette whose strings had been cut.
Effectiveness on the night: 7/10
[img_assist|nid=1645|title=|desc=|link=node|align=right|width=200|height=200]Scott Douglas (Conservative): Main thrust was need for financial pragmatism. Little mention of other ideology. Cheerful as a spaniel in a field full of cow pats.
Best moment: Clear on need for ‘realistic’ education funding, and properly valuing education routes other than university.
Worst moment: Arriving as last-minute replacement for indisposed candidate, and neglecting to tell audience his name. Lost way on arts funding and voter disillusion.
Effectiveness on the night: 6/10
[img_assist|nid=1646|title=|desc=|link=node|align=right|width=200|height=200]Dan Farthing (Liberal Democrat): Like watching a baby rabbit cross Queen Street at rush hour. Abiding impression: There but for the grace of God go I.
Best moment: Survived bodyline opening question on ‘desirable’ English-style Lib-Dem privatisation of NHS for Scotland.
Worst moment: Ghastly candour in declining to comment on the Calman Commission because not a professional politician and didn’t understand it.
Effectiveness on the night: 5.5/10
[img_assist|nid=1647|title=|desc=|link=node|align=right|width=200|height=200]David Jacobsen (Socialist Labour): Earnest, sincere, committed to fairness and helping the disadvantaged. Appears to drink sour milk before speaking in public.
Best moment: Spirited defence of the Arts, prioritising Pilton projects and North Edinburgh News over additional Forth road bridge.
Worst moment: Either mumbling incoherence on tuition fees or appearing to criticise the audience for political apathy.
Effectiveness on the night: 5/10
[img_assist|nid=1648|title=|desc=|link=node|align=right|width=200|height=200]Margo MacDonald (Independent): A subversive wit who relishes speaking her mind, and cross-party cooperation (‘even with Tories, some of whom are normal’).
Best moment: On Farthing distancing himself from English Lib-Dem and Coalition policies: ‘He who flees wi’ the craws gets shot wi’ the craws’.
Worst moment: An admirable sweetie, but she risks overdoing couthiness and becoming a Werther’s Original.
Effectiveness on the night: 8/10
[img_assist|nid=1649|title=|desc=|link=node|align=right|width=200|height=200]Shirley-Anne Somerville (Scottish National): Self-assured, faultlessly on-message. Deputy Whip used the snaffle and the bit all right, but where was the bloody horse?
Best moment: Resolute defence of no tuition fees for Scottish students in Scotland, and promise to balance education budget despite current shortfall.
Worst moment: Appeared vague on government responsibility for funds-cut affecting Arts coordinators in Edinburgh schools.
Effectiveness on the night: 7.5/10
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